I’ve been listening to this master class session on Kabbalah recently, hosted by the brilliant Tony Kosenic, and he’s highlighted so many aspects of my recent spiritual and emotional states that it boggles the mind. There are truly no such things as coincidences, and I’m grateful my Mijael suggested I listen and receive that light and wisdom.
One critical aspect of the Kabbalistic journey that is required to achieve the equivalence of form is one that begins when the creature (in other words, all life and all of creation) is aware of the distinction between it and the creator, and begins to create contrast between itself and the creator. Granted, I am very new to the concepts entirely, and this is just my interpretation. This is significant to me because of the dynamic nature that has been my spiritual path.
Throughout my teenage years, I was a very devout Christian. I went to church every week, often more than once, and loved being taken by the spirit and moved to tears. I made so many friends and loved how accepted I felt (for the most part). In college, I was made aware of the distinction between my body and my spirit, and began to truly explore and prefer the experiences of the five empirical senses. Sex, drugs, alcohol, what have you. These things are neither good nor bad, they just are, and I rejected my relationship with spirit in favor of receiving these things rather than imbuing light. I essentially identified as a very skeptical agnostic, though I always had a feeling that there was something… more out there.
Fast forward to now. Not a moment goes by in my life that isn’t laced with magick. Walking down the street is strolling through the Elysian fields. I commune with ancestors, guardians and guides and engage in multidimensional existence regularly. Yet there’s been a voice of doubt that still seeks to create distinction between my ego and spirit. That wants to shed a light of doubt. “Maybe I really am just crazy,” the voice says. I live my best life and seek only to bring joy and bliss to myself and others. Even if I were crazy, would that really be so bad?
A part of me wants to feel bad about that, but then I look at the journey of Kabbalah, and even my own path through my life, and it just affirms that I am on a path that will eventually take me further than I ever knew was possible. Voice of doubt be damned. All paths eventually lead back to the light, so I will ever remain a blazing star of truth.